a low moment...

I am having a rather low moment. Right now, it feels like nothing good is going to come this week. I dunno if its hormones, or just stress, but feel really negative about everything.
I am so worried that mum's not going to do well, and that this cycle is a bust. I am worried our family xmas will suck cause of family disputes over certain things (that's an entire blog on its own), and mum's health.
Dad was on me today about me picking him up for her surgery... YA WHATEVER! The stress of that coupled with the surgery would definatly kill her! He's so self driven, he says "I don't want to sit here alone, come pick me up...". He's 30 minutes away and mum's got to be at hopsital for 7:45am... not gunna happen! He would make the entire day about himself... screw that! (he had a stroke 7 yrs ago and is not such a nice person anymore, and its all about him him him, grrrrrr. He's living in a nursing home in woodstock where I grew up).
We are broke right now too. We're hoping to be able to pay all the bills next month. David is off work for 3 wks, and I'm off for 2 wks (for xmas)... talk about broke. I don't even think we can afford the iui next month because of the lack of paychecks we'll be getting. We have other bills to pay, ect... so that's not helping either. Having to possibly skip a month.

I feel gassy and moody, and I'm friggin sick and tired of thinking about my period and the 2ww! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. I think my head is going to explode and I feel like I want to break down. I wanna goto bed and not get out until tuesday morning for mum's surgery. I don't want to face the a$$holes on the phone at work tomorrow... I am dreading it all! Ya know I was fine this morning then all of a sudden my mood changed to depression, I felt it come across me like a wave, it was nuts... I haven't been able to shake it I guess.

Does everyone go thru this hell during their 2ww? Gawwwwwwwwwwd!

Okay, I'm going to bed. Hopefully tomorrow I'll wake up in a better mood. Take care all.

TTYL
XOXO